Gosh its been such a long time since I read this edit post. Sometimes it feels surreal..
I wrote this post a long time ago but as I had just read a post by Nuraina A Samad of Takziah to her friend's son who just passed then I decided to just post it and get it out of my list of posts.
The post is quite outdated.. Wish I could say the same for the pain though.
This year is quite the opposite of what I had in mind.. Since the year 2010 is in I thought it would be a joyous year for me, my family and B. But tragedy in life had followed. I've lost 2 most important woman in my life whom one I was suppose to have a future with and the other hold my past. I lost Aunty Asnah who is B's mum in December and my dearest grandmother in January. Losing Aunty is totally heart breaking as I didnt get to know her as well as I wanted to and I didn't get to visit her when she was in the hospital since I'm in Pangkor and December was a totally manic month since its the school holidays. Thank god I get to meet my grandma before she passes after Aunty's funeral and I'm happy that God had taken Atuk as she was suffering.
Looking back..
I met Aunty out of false pretences as B had tricked me by stopping at his house before going on our date. The first time he did that I felt like killing him. I mean.. Hello!! its scary ok..
My heart was beating like nobody's business and I felt like I'm gonna faint. So I was in the living room waiting for aunty to come down. I called my bestie and she told me not to panicked and just be myself and try to be casual.
So the moment came!! Suddenly I can see Aunty coming down the stairs wearing her 'baju kelawar' and I stood up so that I can greet her.
Following my bestie's advice.. which is being myself.. I automatically said in my most cheerful voice ( mind you which is quite high-pitched) " Hai Aunty!! " and she just smiled. Huwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... I suddenly realize.. Shittttttt.. Ade ke patut cakap Hai.. Cakap ar Asmekum ker.. Sopan r skit.. Dah la casual.. Cheery sangat lak tuh.... Huuuuuwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.... Mesti kena strike one.. Giler sedey..
Anyway.. my mum always said that I shouldn't meet my boyfriends family as my mum actually are quite the conservative. But I'm really glad B had tricked me as I got to know her a little bit even if for a short span of time. Her passing hurts and I wish it didn't happen but I guess God knows whats best even if whats best hurts us.
As for looking back and thinking bout the memories of Atuk when I was little... Hahahaha.. Selalu kena sebat or memories of her screaming at me.. I feel sorry for her though as she got a little devil as her grandchild. Mana la orang tua tuh tak marah..
Dekat rumah Aulong, Atuk ade kolah besar which is kind of like a little swimming pool. So one fine day, my aunty's grandma came to our house and talked about mandi bunga since one of my uncle wasn't married yet at the time. I think I was about 7 years old at the time and for a 7 years old girl that sound like a fun thing to do. So I went out and gathered a lot of Atuk's flowers *dah ade point nak kena marah tue* and put it in the 'swimming pool'. Happily I was swimming and playing with the flowers.. Siap scrub diri dengan the flowers and then I heard it.. " Melissa.. Awat duk kat dalam bilik air tuh lama sangat.. Bunyi air nyer takde. Cepat -cepat.. Banyak lagi orang nak mandi nih" So I got out of the pool and gathered all the flowers and took my express shower so that Atuk will hear the sound of water splashing.
So when I'm done I opened up the door to peep whether she's waiting outside and I can see that the line is clear. Got out of the bathroom as fast as I can with flowers in my hand to throw it out before she sees it. Hmmmmmmmm... Yeah Right!!! Suddenly I saw her lurking behind the closet with a furious face. Oppppssssssssss.. and the rest is history. But the good news is that... Since I kind of contaminated the water, Atuk let me play in the pool again with a promise not to ever to that again. Hehehehe.. And I kept that promise.
Nights like this makes me miss her a lot. It doesn't help that I'm listening to Aizat's song Pergi. On a happy note I will always thank God for letting me be with her all this time and not forgeting the time I get to spend with her on her last few weeks before she passes. It was a sad day as both me and ngah2 was crying beside her bed whilst feeding her as I know deep in my heart that this will be the last time and that she'll be taken away from us soon. And He did..
Al-Fatihah
